Dairy Farming Humorist Pillows

"Don't worry, everything is the same, only I fart rainbows."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

A sure sign of rain

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

"Static cling."

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

'Mother, there's something you're not telling me about that alien invasion, I can feel it!'

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

'That GMO gene salesman was darn right!'

'How are you at thinking outside the flocks?'

"That was definitely mine."

Emergency room doctor about half cow: 'Farming accident. Be sensitive - she's beside herself.'

'Tropical fruit, imported cheese, coconuts...I'm not really into that 'eat locally' stuff.'

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

'Ok, this sty is great and all, but can we get some huge explosions? Wilbur, could you say 'it's about to get real'?'

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

Shocking cows and chickens with the ingredients of the cake.

Worse case of chicken pox I've ever seen!

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

'I finnaly located what was causing that hissing sound on the tractor.'

'I promise, you're not crossing to the Dark Side.'

A Tongue Stud.

"I call it 'Moona Lisa'."

"Ok, let's try it one last time. It's 'Ahhhhhh'..."

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'

They're Brazillian!

Cow asks the horse for the carrot.