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Proof of life on earth

Do you realize it's been 23 hours since last I yelled in your face, Rudy? You haven't said anything vacuous. You have not overcharged me or done anything particularly oafish today. I haven't been inclined to remind you you're an embarrassment to humanity for almost an entire day. HOW DARE YOU ALMOST RUIN MY STREAK! I was THIS close.

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

Toothbrush Romance

'Everything is automatic. The coffee turns on at 7:00...They go to work at 7:25 and we go up and get in their bed.'

'Would you like a push Dear?'

A barbarian warrior eats his breakfast

"Hoora! I made it through another day!"

Waking Up With Rooster.

The Lives of the SaintsThis Week: Frieda Witherspoon

Gah! My Timotei is dead. - 'But what have we here? Tresemme with orange, mango, and passionfruit.' - 'Mmmm... passionfruit...' - '*Glug* *Glug* *Glug*' -

'I would suggest a Cabernet Sauvignon. It's non habit forming. I should know. I've been drinking a glass every day for twenty years.'

"No matter the weather or what's on my plate, I'm here at five. That's discipline."

"You've become very predictable, Jack - home every night!"

Kids' energy levels

'And now for the (Yawn!) morning report....'

"Please don't go!"

'My husband does everything religiously except going to church.'

Clock in, Clock out.

"I love you, Ethan, bit I floss alone."

"It's thrilling to watch them come out in the morning, ready for the kill!"

Bad Hair Day

"As long as there's coffee, life will find a way."

Wall Street-Os...contains Marshmallow Shaped Bears & Bulls

"Oh, are you attacking from home today?"

"I don't want a New Year, I want a comfortable, familiar, used year."

"Sundays we like to walk around being insufferable about our routine."

My Day - elevator magazine

A family live separate lives in separate cubicles

"You didn't have to do that, Simon. It tells you on the box if there's a free gift inside!"

Family Curling Habits

"I don't think coffee's gonna do it. You need batteries or something."

"What's so funny? She had to go!!"

'Since we were first married, I vowed I'd never let Jim see me slopping around in the mornings with my hair in curlers!'

"Starting today, we'll get our meals and walks one hour earlier than usual."