Daily Life Observer Pillows

'Think how funny this would all be on a TV sitcom.'

It's not deja vu if you get it every day, Bob.

"Are you completely naked now?"

"You're humming that tune our dryer makes when it's completed the cycle."

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

"We're looking for that perfect blend of vision, ambition and ethical ambiguity."

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

Terry had a computer bug.

'I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, can do my job, but has no interest in having my job.'

"Life: play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, first love, brief happiness, breakup, regret, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, play, work, play, w

"Of course, the actual honey is all made overseas."

Life and Death

Fire hydrant with regular or sparkling water

You trip on it, you buy it.

"Ok, maybe this isn't happening."

"Remember that requirement that you work without supervision? Forget it."

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

"Beats me how pregnancy has survived into the modern era. There's no reception desk, product guarantee nor customer service department!"

Down on Bourbon Street...

"No, it's not codependency. The neediness is just in one direction."

'My salary increase got a few oo-hs.. but no ah-hs..'

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

"He was much more effective in the field."

'Have you ever noticed that as you get older, your thin things get thicker and your thick things get thicker?'

"Closing averages on the human scene were mixed today. Brotherly love was down two points, while enlightened self-interest gained a half. Vanity showed no movement, and guarded optimism slipped a point in sluggish trading. Over all, the status quo remained unchanged."

'Put simply, we need our website to tell consumers all about our company without really telling them anything about our company,'

"And the tech guy said not to worry if I lost my phone. There's an app for that..."

Jenkins! Why is it everything in this office is voice-activated except you?

Maternity Hospital

All You Can Tweet Restaurant.

Will Kill For Food

Mice 25¢