Cyborg Fiction Admirer Gifts

Mitt-Bot's Amazing Origins

City Electronics and Computers...On sale...ROBOT PETS: 'Robot pets is going too far

Bot Art: After da Vinci

"I'm looking for something really dull and repetitive."

"Wow! You do have a triple A membership!"

"And this is one of our most poular models..."

Robot Painter

"If you could change just one thing about yourself, what would it be?" "I’d totally wish to have my brain put into a robot body." "That way I could live forever. Imagine living long enough to buy an iPhone 7000." "Wrong answer. An alpha male never lets on that he’s concerned about his mortality. Your answer should have been 'nothing.'" "The alpha male or female is not afraid of death, little buddy." "I think I’d rather wait for the 7000–S." "Stop it."

"Behold! My greatest improvement to fatherhood. She cooks, cleans, takes care of the kids, burps, and farts. What's more...she self-identifies as a father!"

"Reports that AI is planning a world takeover are greatly exaggerated."

How's your nephew doing in human school this year? Great! He has a calculator and spell checker like last year, and this fall new features have been added. With new translation software he can take language classes now, and for social studies he just clicks "history." Bonjour! I'm so proud! He has the school's highest G.P.A.! Other students can't copy off him anymore because he started using encrypted code. His favorite upgrade is the enhanced ability to process school lunches. He's bee

"Why are all of your answers so mechanical?"

"Shouldn't have, you really."

Employee of the Month

Artificial hearts.

'It just dawned on me that every time we make a phone call, it's a robocall.'

"The difference between us and them is...they can be reproduced by unskilled labour."

"Sure, he has artificial intelligence, but it's his artificial empathy that won me over."

Really? You're hiring me back to replace the robot you just replaced me with? I've had a change of heart, minion. It may be cheaper to automate my café. But it dawned on me that robots don't buy very many drinks. Plus, as much as I try to let the bottom line guide me, I am, deep down, a very compassionate man. I couldn't bear the thought of you being poor and miserable. Maybe he's not such a bad man. Plus, one accidental incineration of a customer and the authorities get all weird about it.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

Robot Office Tasks

"Who's the new guy?"

Robot about to eat a battery

'The really scary part is that he is the new head of human resources.'

'That must be my computer date.'

"Look, I'm doing the human!"

"I have designed us new, steam-powered space suits."

"They're talking about birdhouses again. Time to send them birdhouse ads."

"My 'check engine' light came on."

Now hiring. You seem very motivated. It's my internal drive!

Robot replaces human work

'I am not a robot.'

"Someday our robots will have all our anxieties for us."

Animal Olympics: 'What do you say next year we have some non-cheetah races?'

"A few centuries ago, there was a very primitive system for data transmission: it was called Synapse.