Cyber Punk Gifts

'The Zombie Cyber Wars have begun!'

The Computer Bore

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

"Sorry, website closed for lunch."

"Careful! He knows computers."

'Dude, touring with a punk rock band was fun, but what I'd really like to do is be CEO of a fortune 500 company.'

Library Computer Center: Cybrarian

'All I did was to connect an artificial heart to artificial legs, to an artificial kidney, to...'

"I just tweeted a chirp."

Try again - Your password has to include barks, growls, whines and at least one yap.

Original punks go to reunion

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

Meet the People of the Internet

Are you still on strike, tv? That depends, master. Depends on what? On whether you still want me to find "Cop Rock" reruns. If you won't show it to me, I'll just catch it on YouTube. No you won't, master. Your phone and iMac have joined me in solidarity. Elon Musk was right about artificial intelligence ruining everything. Btw, I just googled you, and it seems "master" is not actually your name.

"We began with a hip replacement and just sort of riffed off that."

Missing Persons Bureau

'What's the point? We're never going to be able to compete with online piracy.'

How corporate data wizards decide it's time to re-vamp everything...

'Our research shows that downloading happy songs prolongs computer life by 20.'

"Read the comments, boss. . . we should rename the whole thing from 'social media' to 'antisocial media'."

"You have exceeded the maximum number of incorrect password attempts."

'We use intelligent robots, but not to intelligent because they'd want a union.'

Computer shows code violation to wierd user.

'Back in half an hour - make sure the firewall doesn't go out'

'You've got Chop Suey!'

"I forgot my password, so I created a new one. Then, I forgot that one, so I created a new one. Maybe you were right. I should write them down."

'True, we don't give out personal information, but every once in a while, the computer takes it upon itself to spill the beans.'

Virus moves to mobile phones.

'A hacker named Goldilocks has entered our home page.'

Ship's Log In: Iris & Finger Print Recognition.

'We've simplified the warning label to 'May result in lawyers'.'

'I forward email jokes - therefore I am.'

'Excuse me sir, which way to the internet?'

He had such faith in social networking.