Cyber Punk Gifts

The Computer Bore

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

"Careful! He knows computers."

'Dude, touring with a punk rock band was fun, but what I'd really like to do is be CEO of a fortune 500 company.'

Library Computer Center: Cybrarian

'All I did was to connect an artificial heart to artificial legs, to an artificial kidney, to...'

Original punks go to reunion

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

Meet the People of the Internet

"We began with a hip replacement and just sort of riffed off that."

'Our research shows that downloading happy songs prolongs computer life by 20.'

"You have exceeded the maximum number of incorrect password attempts."

"Read the comments, boss. . . we should rename the whole thing from 'social media' to 'antisocial media'."

How corporate data wizards decide it's time to re-vamp everything...

Missing Persons Bureau

'What's the point? We're never going to be able to compete with online piracy.'

'We use intelligent robots, but not to intelligent because they'd want a union.'

'Back in half an hour - make sure the firewall doesn't go out'

'You've got Chop Suey!'

"I forgot my password, so I created a new one. Then, I forgot that one, so I created a new one. Maybe you were right. I should write them down."

Computer shows code violation to wierd user.

'True, we don't give out personal information, but every once in a while, the computer takes it upon itself to spill the beans.'

Virus moves to mobile phones.

'A hacker named Goldilocks has entered our home page.'

'I forward email jokes - therefore I am.'

Ship's Log In: Iris & Finger Print Recognition.

'We've simplified the warning label to 'May result in lawyers'.'

'Excuse me sir, which way to the internet?'

Robber trying to break into an online account.