Cyber Friend Gifts

Man in pub puts on coat, saying to work colleagues: 'Must dash ... I want to spend some time on my social-networking sites.'

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

Online Dating

"Out of all your 277 passwords, not once did you use my name. Are you losing feelings for me?"

"Hiya, Beautiful! What's your access code?"

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"The wifi password? Of course Madame, it's 'Ilove100boobies69'."

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

'Our special of the day is spam sandwiches.'

"Darling Elizabeth! How I long to hold you betwixt my giant industrial clamps."

'These computer viruses are getting more and more powerful.'

"Are bringing your new girlfriend to the office party?"

"One of you got online and stole my identity, which is weird because there's not one thing unique about us."

Recycling bin for iPads.

'Hey! — they're rerunning the Commander Data show!'

"Sorry, your password must have at least nine characters, with both letters and numbers."

"Hang on - I've got an app for this. . ."

"Bob and I met when we hacked into each other's computers and discovered how much we have in common."

Pomeroy is terrified somebody will break into his files. A real case of "hackrophobia"!

"You have the right to one phone call, or one cell phone call, or one pager call, or one e-mail!"

"No, Billy! That's 'Amen'... not 'Logout'!"

"Hey Cruz, check out my super-powered speaker system!"

"The doctors running late. Feel free to catch up on your binge watching in our waiting room."

New to selfies? Pick a style!

'I occasionally need to read my tweets to remember what I was doing.'

"Actually write thank-you notes to my best customers with a pen and paper? But I wouldn't have spell check!"

'I've got 8350 followers but none of them is here to buy me the next drink!'

My digital assistant device hears things in my house and then targeted ads are sent to me, but it seems like there are still some bugs in the system. I can explain it, Frank, you're always talking about golf. The device hears "tee" and get ads for "tea." When the golf pros are on TV I get ads for cars and pet shopts. That's because the device repeatedly hears "long drive" and "birdie." Then when I talk about my playing golf, I get ads for knives and fishing equipment. Of course! The devi

Graduation Day at Drone School

'Jeremy and I have decided to take our online relationship to a new level - real life.'

Missing the human touch.

'I know we met on the internet, but stop double clicking that mouse every time you try to make a move.'

Made obsolete by miniaturization.

'Be careful! It could be a phishing mail!'