Customs Regulation Buff Pillows

Why used clothing should be declared a dangerous weapon...

"We won!"

'Hey! Hey! You need a trout stamp! Where's your trout stamp?!'

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

"These are just the guidelines, the forms are in the truck outside!"

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

"Don't worry! He's totally changed..."

'I'm afraid we can't deliver your baby until your CRB check comes through.'

Dr Ed Henderson demonstrates that it IS possible for someone to become too familiar with the safety rules.

How Many It Takes

An astronaut sees a sign saying zoning in force.

'Oh no. Another major code violation decision.'

'That's our corporate ladder.'

He waited for the next wave of regulations to arrive.

'He's trying to persuade the Inland Revenue that it's a tax haven.'

"According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything."

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

'You forgot the product label.'

"Uh oh, here come more regulations."

'The health and safety officer isn't happy. He want's you to tie your shoelaces.'

'There's no need for confusion. Part 935 of Mining Regulation 823, Section 323 in Article L clearly states . . . '

'I have nothing to declare... Okay, I liked Maui better.'

'Dalrymple came to us from the public sector.'

'And then the bad man from the Securities and Exchange Commission and I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house down!'

'Looks like the latest crime figures have been stolen.'

'Give me your bag Oscar - if you want to do the genius gag.'

Freeway exit signs: Regulation, Deregulation, Reregulation.

'It's from the Federal Trade Commission -- we have to put in a non-smoking section.'

News and Magazines. New Economic Regulations. "New economic regulations" --- What do you suppose they are? "Come to a complete stop"?

'Arghhh! He's got no face!'

"Sorry Sir, no hoodies."

'Legislature' doctor scratching his head over a syringe marked 'Free market Principles' with those marked 'Regulations' in the bin

"You're on the green list."

When government regulations go too far.