Custody Battle Commentator Pillows

'I got custody of the kids.'

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"An Iraq attack is one thing, but I'm not sure about a Persian incursion."

War 2023

"So I'm like, doesn't anyone speak proper English any more?"

"Great news, things are looking up in Iraq!"

"You got custody of us, mommy, because you're the very best attorney picker."

Armchair quarterback/Armchair everything

Bartender: 'Bad day, huh?' Man: 'I'll say. My vindictive ex-wife just won sole custody of my inner child.'

Executioner forgetting his glasses.

"No sense of smell, ears plugged and eyes fixed on their phones. I'm telling you, if I weren't domesticated I'd be all over that."

"The governor is considering your petition. He has one question: did you vote for him the last election?"

Toy Soldiers - Toy Human Shield

Dog's Loo

"You're not fooling me. I can spot 'fake mews'."

''Honor thy father and thy mother'? -- What about custody disputes?'

Birthdays were always better at Mom's.

Dogs at Dog Show Judging the Judges.

"The custody battle could go on for months, and cost you a small fortune. Why don't you just buy yourself ANOTHER dog?"

The face mask

Ukraine Crisis

Supine Court

"I never want to speak to you again, but I'm find with sex and other non-verbal activities."

'Guess what? The judge awarded ME custody in today's two child custody cases!'

"This is a much better war then the war to end all wars."

'Your wife gets custody of the children, and you get custody of the babysitter.'

Guardianship of minors

"Okay, these are the documents we need to sue your ex for child support, and if we can convince the court it's not too out off line, to have the words, 'lying, cheating b*****d' tattooed on his forehead."

Tug of war.

"Her lawyers were very good."

"I'm sorry, Jim. Due to a paperwork error, you now have custody of my kids."

"Maybe we should have filed a friend of the court brief, too."

'You need to say more about the war than just 'oops'.'

''Woof, Woof, Woof.' You call that a blog entry?'

Dogs discussing human commend pet peeves.