Current Affairs Dodger T-Shirts

"Would you feel better, Sue...if we stopped watching the news?"

Fear of news.

'Now,they're going to teach you to talk, but remember, after you learn how.stay away from religion or politics.'

"We're bears you fool, we don't need agendas!"

'I think we should consider hiring a consultant to share the blame.'

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

'officially, I'm on leave, but I'm really just ducking the media.'

"How do I turn off my camera so no one stares?"

Thank You For Not Giving Me Your Views About Brexit

"Arithmetic doesn't agree with me."

"I've had custom reading glasses made that blot out the words 'brexit' and 'royal.'"

"Just once, can we not talk about politics."

"Can you send me a text so I can use it as a ruse to get out of this conversation?"

'I gained about two hours a day. I gave up the New York Times.'

"If you don't want to know the result of the united game then look away now"

'Look, I'm a goat, not an elephant. I really don't want to debate politics during the game...'

Personnel. The gap in my resume is when I got turned out on my back for six months.

Bob worked hard to avoid the spotlight.

'Does the Fifth Amendment apply to report cards?'

"Pretend relationships are better than real ones."

"Must be question time again."

"Must...not gaze into...his eye! For I may...never break free!"

'...and now to continue our exciting coverage of the election debate.'

"How's your substitute history teacher, Baldo?"

"So I'm thinking...why bother with all the junk mail?"

"I'm had a miserable day, so I'd appreciate it if neither of you mention politics, wildfires or COVID."

Cone of Silence

"So I take it you won't be going to the staff Christmas party!"

'It appears the best way to be politically correct is to be apolitical.'

Glass who didn't want to get involved in the argument.

"I don't want to get into a hypothetical debate about the nature of reality while I'm watching 'Bargain Hunt'. . ."

"I really should call my mother — I just don’t want to talk to her."

"We need to shelter him from all news about economic indicators!"

'I found I'm able to maintain my disposition by not watching any economic or employment news.'

'Maybe he doesn't want to know what's going on in the world.'