Cup Of Joe Appreciator Gifts

"Flavor? It's 'let me drink my first cup before I stab you in the eyes' flavor."

Some days at work can be more challenging than others.

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

"Of course I've been drinking!"

'Sorry'

Drinking Companions

"Oh boy, by the way this guy is moving, we can assume he's got some of our friends in his pants..."

New, Improved Cat

'Sometimes it's not a very good idea to be indecisive.'

Self-Esteem Clinic.

Join me in a cup of tea!

"I've got pride but no shame."

"Who wants to go for walkies?"

'S**t!'

Well there's something you don't see every day...

"We've had complaints."

Must you people always call during dinner? - Grim Reaper on the phone.

Caddy With A Cool Box

'I told you a blowgun was a bad idea!'

'Put the sword back in the stone right now, little girl, and we'll pretend this never happened.'

'Coffee, tea, or banana?'

'I told you to be careful near my piercings, Gavin - they're not beer can ring pulls, you know!'

"Are you nuts? This is what I do."

"Do we have any candy?"

Green Coffee

'Would you like something from the trolley doctor ? '

'Hmmm...I think I know what he's saying here. Sometimes we manage to break through the walls that hold us back, only to find...another wall! Yes! I get it!'

'This is him, on the hands free.'

"THIS is the cup of a Carpenter."

Bank robber to teller after robbery: 'Now, I'd like to talk to you about opening a savings account.'

"Have you got it in beige?"

'75% of our resources are spent dealing with the elderly and infirm...and that's just the STAFF!'

"Can we stop in here real quick first?"

"It's the mark of Cain, but it's benign."