Culture Shaker Gifts

"In this company, Simmons, we hold our hands steady in the middle and shake our bodies."

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

Free speech isn't cheap!

"As the new head coach, my first move will be to blow up the entire roster."

The American Tearoom, Moscow

"I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all!"

"It's a Mexican Wave!!"

Great Poets of Catalogdom

"What are we doing for Cinco de Mayo this year?"

Chief of Staff A North American Indian working away in an office.

Blue Blazer Cocktail.

A Night In the Art Gallery

Pub Kendo.

'It's a selfie.'

First O.M.G. church.

Hip-Hopalong Billy Bob blamed the censors for killing the country-rap scene.

University Challenge

"Threatened the prosperity of the free world lately?"

"My mind is still on vacation."

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

'Well, now do you believe that snow global warming is real?'

'How do I celebrate Spring? Cinco de Vino.'

'That's the great Scottish Indian fighter, Hawkeye the Noo!'

'I told you not to try to order in Spanish.'

"I'm so disappointed, because I thought it was a new C&A."

Country trees visit the city.

Comfort Zone Lady Leaving a Room.

'Look out lads. They've got vuvuzelas!'

"Patel confirmed"

"Say your prayers, liturgies, Tefilah, Daily Salat, Sacred Mantra, Ritual Incantation or the secular affirmation of your choice, Varmint!”