Culinary Traveler T-Shirts

'You drive a Japanese car, drink French wine, eat Chinese food, own an American computer, buy Canadian lumber and vacation in Mexico. How can you be AGAINST free trade?!'

'I say, if they want to live in this country, they should follow our culture... By the way, what do you want for dinner - Mexican, Chinese or Italian?'

Man on holiday sees meal times listed every hour

Grogansburg, 1 Mile. Diet Grogansburg, 3 Miles

Frank and Ernie's Diner. I'll have the beef and tomato consomme from Santiago. Coming up one chilly Chile Chili!

Market items.

Alphabet soup

'Don't give up hope - Anthony Bourdain is bound to show up sooner or later.'

'I'm just back from my 'Cheeses of France' discovery tour...It was amazing!...'

We can order Lebanese, Korean, Vietnamese, Italian, Chinese, Thai, Indian or Greek.

I love Fried Green Tomatoes

"Did you get the Gundersons' pics of their Caribbean cruise?"

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"You do like octopus?"

What the Doctor Ordered

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

La Table

'Chocolate milk, carrot cake,candied yams...see, there's a solution to everything!'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

"I'm just here to pick up some bagels."

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

'Like death by salad.'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

Bermuda Triangles

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

"Rump roast?"

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"