Culinary Trainer Gifts

"Trust me, boss, he knows his pies...he just needs more retraining."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Come dine with me!

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"First cook the cake, then apply icing sugar and candles..."

"I'm so proud - she's already learning her shapes."

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

"I've had it with you guys! From now on, have your arguments on your own time!"

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

Chef uses Harp to cut Sausages

Bedtime Stories with Gordon Ramsay

'Mary had a little lamb - with mint jelly.'

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

"When I was young, we personally prepared all the food for each and every meal!"

'It's all homemade.'

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

A chef teaches a classroom of other chefs how to properly flip something using a spatula.

"Then add one extra large egg..."

Al Dante

Old Spice

'Who ordered the shark?.' '

'Hold on, Pepe!... The score is tied with less than a minute to go - and the losing team gets boiled.'

Cooking with Pierre

'Two famous French wines.' 'Red and white.'

'Maybe we shouldn't show how sausage and foie gras are made on the same day.'

Cheese Secret