Culinary Show Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Be a dear and nip to the chippy will you, love?'

'I sent out for everything.'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

Benihana style of cooking.

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

Baker Romance

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

'I was in the catering corps.'

Restaurant Chef with book titled: 'Introduction To Cooking'.

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"Room for dessert, folks?"

Feast

The Perfect Foil

'The following programme contains scones of a sexual nature.'

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

Great moments in 'Haute Cuisine'. . . America gives the world the Donut Sandwich.

Cookery Lesson.

Doctor uses thermometer to check chicken.

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

"And finally the chef's surprise - the check!"

The perfect man

'Maybe we shouldn't show how sausage and foie gras are made on the same day.'

A Matryoshka dolls putting an oven in an oven

'A lovely day, a good meal, and, thank heaven, no guilt.'