Culinary Humor Lover Pillows

Pizza with 'Made in China' imprinted on it.

'It's blueberry... Blackbirds are out of season.'

'How's your liver?', 'Okay for now, but my doctor told me to take it easy.'

"Can I get a number 2 with extra nuts?"

"I'll have the Eggs Benedict Arnold."

"I'll bet you're very proud of your handsome, well-behaved little sporks here."

Minted Lamb: 'Oh, my god! I've won the lotto!'

We deliver carry out orders by hummer.

Skeleton staff. No food to be consumed on these premises.

'You know what would go really well right now? A light sorbet to cleanse the palate.'

GM food

"I'd rather be seared by Emeril than sauteed by Rachel."

"I'm sorry about the delay, sir, but Chef's anger management class ran over."

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

Soup of the month.

"That's it. We’re toast."

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

'The Burrito King.'

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

"The meatloaf just tapped S.O.S. in Morse code."

A Club Sandwitch.

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

"What do you suggest...the tuna fish or the peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich?"

"Bottled, tap or toilet water?"

I don't know what happened to the poor guy, but he's visibly shaken.

"What happened to the thin crust guy I married?"