Culinary Golfers T-Shirts

Harold eats lunch like he plays golf.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Counting ribs

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Before getting a basketball scholarship, Jack worked at a pancake house.

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

Baker Romance

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

'I was in the catering corps.'

Restaurant Chef with book titled: 'Introduction To Cooking'.

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"Nobody truly appreciates the magic that goes into a good omelet."

Feast

"Room for dessert, folks?"

The Perfect Foil

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

Great moments in 'Haute Cuisine'. . . America gives the world the Donut Sandwich.

Cookery Lesson.

Doctor uses thermometer to check chicken.

'Needs more kale.'

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

The perfect man

A Matryoshka dolls putting an oven in an oven

'A lovely day, a good meal, and, thank heaven, no guilt.'