Culinary Enthusiast Intrigued By Oddities Gifts

'The Chef wants to know what you'd like for your last meal.'

"I don't think the turkey's going to be done on time. That's the dishwasher."

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

Cheese Secret

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

Cooking With Pollock.

"Ciiiiiilaaaantrooooo."

Thanksgiving Game Highlights

"All right, we straighten this out immediately! René threw the bouillabaisse at Jacques, no? The Jam-bon en croûte was thrown by Jacques at René, correct? The truite en gelée and the fraises des bois were thrown by François at Henri, and Henri threw the mousse au chocolat at François, and . . ."

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

'Try slicing the bread, Brian!'

Chernobyl Chow

Man eating his meal with his feet.

Tsunami in the cooking pot.

"You've actually done something even Gordon Ramsay can't do-burn the salad!"

Martian restaurant and take away

'I told you we shouldn't have brought him.'

'Killing two birds with one stone...bacon coffee.'

'Hello, police? There's been a food fight here and I'm afraid the cheese got the worse of it.'

"She always said she'd only share this recipe over her dead body."

Chef chasing an egg.

'What can you whip up real quick? We're eating on the run today.'

"No, he isn't choking. He coughed."

Ramsay's kitchen nightmare.

Struggling chef.

Tinguely, Jean. Homage to the Dinner Party Mother Spent Months Preparing. Performance Piece. 1926.

'Food critics cannot determine what are crime scenes.'

Donner party of six.

'Dinner will be a little late -- I was overcome by the fumes.'

"Iron Chef, my ass!"

'Take no notice, I fired him ten minutes ago.'