Culinary Contrast Fan Pillows

Good cop, bad cop

Pasta

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

"Hurry, I've been waiting for you."

'It's that damned gnome that attracts them!'

'Personally, I don't question these things. My snout period will simply end when it ends.'

Overly wordy travel.

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

The End is Near. Have A Cone.

Cow Cow Plops.

"Everything here is very fresh."

'I think the microwave has finally given up the ghost.'

"The chef is a frustrated architect."

You're late!

"That comes with some peanuts in a galosh."

'I hope we have the spelling test early, while I'm still under the influence of my alphabet cereal.'

'Whoever called this job WAITING obviously never did it!'

'You know, I wouldn't mind all this fiber if I could smoke it.'

'Enough with the eye of newt. Do you know how many calories there are in newt eyes?'

Bug Burgers and Chips at The Golden Toadstool

'It's an epic mural called 'The Sees of Change'.'

"I have a food intolerance - I can only eat photogenic food."

'Your ball park mustard, Sir.'

The Peacock Skirt - Whistler's Peacock Room

"You're embarrassing yourself again Edward. If you want a bigger wine glass, just ask the waiter."

"The book says this is his early period."

Sushi spinoffs.

Fruit & Fiber Optics.

Large box of baking soda in the morgue.

Wordilly Durdillies - Fan assisted oven.

'Master's dog before you was a Great Dane: Welcome to the family Mr Chihuahua...'

Catching your own fish in a restaurant.

"This is by far my favorite store."