Culinary Chaos Aficionados Gifts

Russian eggs.

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

"I don't think the turkey's going to be done on time. That's the dishwasher."

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

"I've had it with you guys! From now on, have your arguments on your own time!"

Man's cooking explodes.

Cafe Burns.

Ten out of ten for effort...

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

Anti-inflammation recipes

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

Chef De Party.

"It's a recipe from the 'Anti-Christ' cookbook."

It's all gravy.

Disaster in the kitchen.

Waiter' You betta stop that food fight, you SILLY fools! Here comes the Maitre D' !'

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

'You made me jump.'

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

Cooking With Pollock.

"All right, we straighten this out immediately! René threw the bouillabaisse at Jacques, no? The Jam-bon en croûte was thrown by Jacques at René, correct? The truite en gelée and the fraises des bois were thrown by François at Henri, and Henri threw the mousse au chocolat at François, and . . ."

A short-order cook gets sucked into the exhaust vent over the grill.

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

'Barry, I think I know where you left the champagne bottle.'

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

Chef looking up confused, Waiter behind him with pancake on his head.