Cubicle Chief T-Shirts

"Give a man a job, and he'll work all day. Teach a man to delegate, and he'll take the rest of the day off."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"My email is down... talk to me."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

Overworked in the office

'Is that the sweet smell of success or some imitation air freshener?'

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

Food Chain, Inc: 'UP...DOWN'.

"On the plus side, I finally have a key to the executive washroom."

"At this office no two days are different."

Another day at work would be one too many...

Office slaves.

"Yes, I saw the obituary. So, is that why you weren't in yesterday?"

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'

'The boss put his picture up to enspire us. But it just isn't having that effect on me.'

Inout baskets.

"Bill's a little upset. The boss just chewed him out."

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

'Thanks to the huge bonus, I find myself forced to admire you.'

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

'We feel it's very important to provide our employees with an extremely comfortable work-place environment. Primarily because we don't allow them to ever go home.'

Computer monitor for a head.

Man suffering from rope burn due to climbing the corporate ladder

"We should have taken the cubicles."

'We believe in using performance-enhancing drugs here.. they're called bonuses.'

'Parsloe, your desk is blocking the corporate food chain.'

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

"Yes, social media's a great way to express your opinions - shame you feel 'ignored and unappreciated by an aloof, faceless boss' - but that's because I haven't a clue who you are or what you do around here!"

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

Work Slave

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'