Crucifix Collector Pillows

My belief is better than yours!

Vicar on desert island with palm tree cross.

"You're on a what?!"

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

Cat statues on entrance gate

Barristers

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

'Here was proof that Lawrence was indeed an Englishman."

"I believe it was called 'cursive'."

"But if we win and the Visigoths lose then we're the wild card."

Football supporters.

'It's a statue of St. Francis of Assisi. I had it specially made for my hospital.'

The Unknown Attorney: The First To Double His Billable Rate.

"Now now, what have I told you about using your zombie knife at the dinner table..."

Don't you like it, Dad?

"Everyone is so cynical these days."

Mr Punch's Design for A Statue to Miss Nightingale

Bear Bears his Cross

"You can't even sit there and tell me with a straight face, can you?"

Swiss excalibur...

'Ever try beating a ploughshare into a sword?'

Surgeons using a Swiss Army Knife.

'I don't know what it is but those tusks would make beautiful knife handles.'

Never Bring a Knife to a Gun Fight

Dennis's fear of sharp objects was well founded on his recent trip down memory lane."

The Dead Sea Squirrels.

Knife splits newly weds on wedding cake

'I'm beginning to think the definition of 'hero' isn't what it used to be.'

'The good ol'days actually mean 'when I was young'.'

Epitaph - 'I'm With Stupid'

Lady Liberty is begging for money

'I'll take them all.'