Crown Connoisseur Pillows

"She's definitely had work done."

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

'And what do you do?'

"I may be a newt, but I'm still King -- find that witch!"

King Edward VII

Crown Jewels

'The Burrito King.'

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

"A Bill of Rights? - Don't you TRUST me?"

Dog Walker

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

Shaved Ice

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Disraeli becomes Earl of Beaconsfield

Moliere

Charles Dickens.

Bleak House

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

King Richard I

Good Cop, Bad Clown: 'Ok, ok I'll tell you what you want! Just make that creepy clown stop staring at me!'

'I got them to agree to a small settlement.'

'Do you have an appointment?'

"Don't forget, the market will take a sharp downturn on the stroke of midnight."

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

'Don't look now, but they're starting ANOTHER religion in the Middle East.'

"The Founding Fathers?! Ha! That’ll never stick!"

'He was an evil king.'

"Hold on there buddy, that's not a KJV Bible." (two men talking, one with a Bible)

'I'm beginning to think that you're WILLFULLY apathetic!'

'Your business plan needs work, I'm not feeling a tingle of moral remorse.'

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

'Honey, I fear, to be a European patriot means a little more than having a German beer for breakfast, Italian pizza and French wine for lunch and Spanish brandy for dinner...'

Sergei Rachmaninov

When feud becomes best seller! Moby Dick vs Herman Melville!