Crosswalk Strategist Gifts

Walk. Wait. Reassess your Priorities.

The fate of the emigrant

"I AM at my usual position."

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

Push for Disco...

'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'

Punishment for the kicker.

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'Hours out here in the freezing cold and not a deer in sight! That's it - I'm going home!'

'What makes you think we want to sell you son.'

'And remember...no sudden moves in the shoot out.'

Footballers - Kevin Keagan

Builder follows an architect's blueprints exactly, including the smudges.

"To cross street, push button, wait for walk signal, wait, wait some more."

"This is my stop, Phil, you'll be C.E.O. till Sixty-third Street."

'I don't want to mention any names, but one of you isn't giving 100% out there.'

"Quick, Bartlett! Instill them with hope!"

Sidewalk the game

'Never say never.'

"The building code says we can use structural steel and poured concrete, and we can go 40 stories high - it doesn't say we have to!"

'I'm proud of the lads. They show'd a lot of character coming back from one down. . . then two or three silly goals. . . At this level you get punished. But overall I thought we were a bit unlucky. . .'

Waddle and Don't Waddle.

Martin Jol

'No exceptions, Caldwell! If you want to make this team, you've got to make it past my mother-in-law!'

"Go join your coach and the rest of your team. I'll be watching from the bar."

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

'Look up... Look down... Look at my thumb. Gee, You're...'

Watch for Pedestrians.

Two men trout fishing

'We'll only have a five minute window, everything has to be timed to the last second.'

'Remember, we're in red and yellow - all the rest are bad guys...'

"He's told them many a time, not to let defenders shoot, but do they take any notice. . ?"

'When he plays, our opponents hear footsteps.'

Benchwarmer coach.

"Hands are much more capable of efficiently directing a ball into a net!"