Critter Champions T-Shirts

'Ants of all lands, unite!'

"So, what did you do at charter school today?"

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

"Wait a minute. Have you guys thought about how this thing is supposed to fit in there?"

"Don’t worry, girl. I’m working on our ‘no puppy left behind.’"

'What a lot of fuss, fancy being afraid of an 'itsy-bitsy' little mouse like this!'

Schrodingers cat at the vets

'Alex we talked about this, you can't bring live things home from the lake. . . no buts, they don't want to leave the lake. Let your little friends go.'

Stu just wanted to participate in the outdoor art class. . . alone. . . but Bob went ahead and invited himself anyway. . .

Ralph has lots of animal magnetism.

"I've got a pulse!"

The four freedoms: freedom to bark, freedom from fetching, freedom to sleep on any piece of furniture, freedom from leashes.

'Never shoot straight up.'

Raccoons! Single file into the crate! Snake! Back in your hole! Crickets! Keep it down! Animal Control Freak.

Humane Mouse Trap "It doesn't kill them,. It just makes them feel really guilty about inconveniencing you."

"This is just a model, but you get the idea."

Playing catch with dog until your arm gives out.

"I'm from PETA. I have a report you are beating a dead horse."

Possum Army HQ. Here's the casualty report, sir --- You have to take it with a grain of salt, of course.

'You just stood there and let them put a bell on you? -- What were you THINKING?'

'He says the scent killer isn't working. He can still smell us.'

"That was a silly way to split the dung Fred! How are we supposed to roll our share home now?"

'I don't regard hunting as a sport.' 'Neither do I!'

Pet owner to pets in chair: 'We need to come up with some kind of time-sharing system.'

'Well, I still say he looks nothing like me!'

Cat and Mouse

"Ooh - that one was a bit gamey."

"Boy that was a cryptic message you left with my mum! OK, I've come to park with a bat, now what?"

Dad, I want a pet!

'And after they figure out human rights, they'll start on ours.'

Insect Insults.

An angry Fox has reclaimed his former fur from a Women who was wearing it as a coat.

Adopt a Desert