Criminal Justice Aficionado Pillows

"Great news, Phil! The governor has determined that you don't have a high enough I.Q. to merit execution."

"Well, then Henshaw, are you going to talk sense or would you like another night of uniterrupted Hindemith?"

'Oh, I didn't have a trial. The judge said I was pre-qualified.'

He was a man of strong convictions - Sing Sing 3 to 5, Leavenworth 6 to 12.

"That's blind loyalty for you."

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"This one's called 'Incarceration.'"

'They're very proud of me. I'm the first in my family to be convicted of a white-collar crime.'

"You're not grandma at all! In fact, I think this is a case of identity theft!"

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

"At least he's honest about it..."

"Undiagnosed serial killer"

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

The Investigation

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

Ancient Egyptian crime scenes.

'Make it look like an accident.'

'Speak of the devil, there's my attorney now.'

CW 'Text' Yomp Sidekicks: Attorneys-at-law,

'Tonight's special presentation, 'The Myth of the Mafia,' was made possible by a grant from the Gambino family.'

Frank abuses the Power of Attorney.