Crimes And Headlines Lover Pillows

'So one day I thought, I'll teach you brats to laugh at me!'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

Just our luck...old school crime translation classes!

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'

"You think you're gonna whack me and this will be over?"

'Come on inspector, you call this fair?'

Newton's Law and Order.

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

"Paper or plastic?"

"Damn it—I told them I was too well known for undercover work!"

News Headline Reads - 'Man Bites Feral Media'.

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

"Gee, Marshal, he must have been one of the good guys"

"Here are today's political campaign numbers: spin is up 10%, truth is down 5%, flip flops up 20%..."

Handcuffs.

'Vice squad - you're busted.'

"Make it look like an accident"

"It's a beautiful day except for the murders."

"Then I tried the move from business casual to white collar crime."

"You're under arrest for an attempted murder."

Parachuting with Concrete Shoes

'Don't you people ever take a pulse? ! '

Fingerprint Show

Sketches by Boz - A Pickpocket Being Wheelbarrowed to Police Station

'Sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs record anything incriminating.'

'They profiled me just because I'm a bank robber!'

'Did he say anything before he died?'

"Well, when you were called a 'bad dog,' were you publicly harmed?"

'A fine? It's not as though I ran over more than one building inspector.'

"Law & Order: Museum Guards."