Crime Narrative Fan T-Shirts

"Now, see here, I've been wronged! Some no-good do-nothing rat pack got me sick, and I gotta know who!"

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

Cat Burglar

"Puss in cement boots"

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"'A body at rest'? -- Are you writing murder mysteries now, Isaac?"

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

"And just how do you expect to become a made man, son, without a solid liberal-arts education?"

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

Crime in bookshop

Tree Mobsters. 'I didn't hear anything. Did you hear anything?' 'I didn't hear anything.'

"Don't make me send in the bad cat."

The GODFATHER Ride 25¢

The evidence destroyed

"Ask the gumshoe. He'll tell ya the saucer was empty when I got there. Go on, gimme a purr detector test. I got all night."

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'

'Mark Antony addreses the mob'

Police outline artist training academy: the intro 101 class.

Oliver Twist - Oliver Introduced to Fagin

PARALEGAL, 'Hi -- I'm a paracriminal.'

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

Moses as a mobster.

"This little piggy went to market, this little piggy drove the getaway car..."