Crime Mysteries Gifts

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

Chicken CSI.

'You've got to admit, it's an effective witness protection program!'

"Well, obviously the victim had a French enemy."

The letter was captivating – mind you, by nature, most ransom notes are.

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

hard-boiled egg...

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

The Philip Marlow family

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'Veins...arteries...I told you I can never tell one from another.'

"You're not grandma at all! In fact, I think this is a case of identity theft!"

Dog detectives

Mafia Family Life: 'I'm sorry dear - but I had to bring some work home!'

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

"Damn it—I told them I was too well known for undercover work!"

'Where did I bury the loot? -- I thought you buried the loot!'

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

The Meeting

Locking Up Crime

Optician and the PI.

'Have you got any good 'whodunnits'...?'

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'

"Then I tried the move from business casual to white collar crime."

"Make it look like an accident"

Trilby - 'Taffy was allowed to see Gecko'.

"So, while extortion, racketeering, and murder may be bad acts, they don't make you a bad person."

Why did the chicken cross the mafia

'It's had the best reviews I've ever written.'

'Brilliant writing, Mr. Fenswick, but I'm afraid we'll have to pass on your 'How to Commit the Perfect Crime'!'

"Hmm. . . it looks like he was struck on the head with a blunt object. . . If only I could find out what the murder weapon could be. . ."