Crime Investigators T-Shirts

'Sorry, they all smell the same to me.'

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

Giant pandas doing surveillance in a zoo.

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

'Here, we started to be investigated...'

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

'It was part way through the initial investigation that detective Walters felt as if he was being watched, but there was no one in the room. No one that is except the cat, who sat contently on the chair and watched him with an almost human repose.'

"It's either the Ten Commandments or the Mueller Report."

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"True crime meets reality TV"

'Then my brother said he'd like to bury the hatchet...'

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.

'So, in room 1 we sweat them. 2 is for grilling, 3 is for roasting. We leave them to simmer in room 4...'

Office of the Special Investigator: Stepped out to follow the 'money trail'.

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

'I believe the murderer is in this very room.'

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."