Crafty Jokester Pillows

'Are we painting their Birthday Suits?'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

A crab with a utility knife claw

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"Yeah, uh, maybe you're not cut out to be the 'sparkly' kind of vampire."

"Okay, who's been messing with the copy machine?"

"Remember that ultimately we must answer to Chairs."

Drainpipe in a sombrero.

Men dancing

Leaving cards.

Lengray's 1,001 practical Jokes for beginners (a man getting punched in the face with a mechanical glove).

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

"You idiots … we lost!"

'This painting's in very poor taste.' 'Yes. It's from his sour grapes period.'

'Okay Dad, time to unwind.'

'But seriously, folks... Who knows how many blondes it takes to screw in my latest invention?'

"Your Covid-19 Test Results Are In..."

'The electricians hot-wired the building inspector's car seat again.'

'Hey,mom-have you seen my pet frog?'

'If you cut back on children, at least try to eat them before they nibble on your house.'

Dry Hard with a Vengeance

"Is there a humorist in the house?"

'You're breaking up...please text me.'

'As I feared, the X-ray shows that you are crying inside.'

'Tender and Juicy.'

"It's a brovella about my life in the frat. But if it's longer than two hundred pages it becomes a brahvel."

Celebrity Clown Rehab: 'And so how does that make you feel, Chuckles?'

Golf Myth #293--Ball Washer