Crafting Fanatic Pillows

Hansen's Glue-All Multi-Purpose Glue

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

"It's a lot of work, but we've decided to renovate this old factory."

"You'll have to excuse my Stuart. He's just showing off his new drill.

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

"At this establishment, you can't have your cake and eat it too!"

"She's a natural!"

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

7 Dwarves of Fatherhood

'Somebody keeps snapping all the stud boards in half. Anybody know anything about this?'

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

101 uses of a dead cat: pincushion

"I think I know where the passion in our marriage has gone."

"I can now fetch anything you want - on Etsy."

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.

'We've had an application from No.10 Downing Street. . . they need to extend their cabinet room.'

'I'm knitting a scarf for my son.'

"Just so you understand in advance - we're not old-time craftsmen, and we don't take pride in our work."

...they can't take the factory out of the man - he's off to do some welding.

"That's just great! Enough with the public displays of affection!"

Crafty Beer: "I'm making a scrapbook of when you were still fermenting."

"That's still too high"

'I thought I'd cut out the middle men.'

Artisanal Pottery

Swiss-army rock...

'Honey, I think you overdid the plastic canvas decorations in the bathroom.'

"...now she's up tp a jumper a week."

'I ran into a whittler.'

At Halloween a little kid leaves the house wearing his father's construction clothes, tool belt and hard hat. In the window is a pumpkin with a hard hat on.

Cavewoman knitting with wool from mammoth

Woman shops while man sets up noose. "Do I go with bright white, deep white...."

'No I don't have scissors you can borrow.'

Binge Scrapbooking: the morning after.

Pin Cushion to roll of cotton: 'Hi! I'm a pin cushion! I love my job!' Pin Cushion's reply: 'MASOCHIST!'