Cowboy Storyteller Gifts

"Wilson, you got your ass in a jam again, don't you?"

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

"Can't we ride off in another direction?"

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

The Not So Wild West

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

'I don't know about you, Clyde, but I'm getting a mighty uneasy feeling we could be riding straight into an ambush interview!'

Cowboy directions 'Up yonder', 'Down yonder', 'This-A-Way' and 'That-A-Way'.

(Maps to the Homes of the Steers) (Maps $ 100)

'Well, so much for our legendary ability to eviscerate cattle with surgical precision...'

Civil Howdy Pardnership

Sea Horse outside saloon

"I made partner!"

Wild West Text Showdown

'Can we skip to the part where I charge with a light saber?'

'I AM a cowboy so therefore they ARE cowboy boots, OK?'

"You must be new around here, pardner."

Jasper's Limo Service.

Cowboy

"This horse comes with all the hardware necessary to be fully autonomous."

'This is as close to a round up I'll ever get.'

"And what if I don't want to be Jack or Ennis?"

"They say it's the last of the really big cattle drives, and I'm just glad I'm here to see it."

'I don't like it... It's too quiet.'

'Oh yeah. He's the fastest in the west alright. The fastest out of town, at the first sight of trouble.'

"Well of course you're depressed... You're a country and western singer."

Adios Amoebas

"An accountant? No son of mine is going to be an accountant! You'll be an octopus wrangler like your old man, and like it!"

All the other land having been claimed and fenced already, Jedidiah bought his own range from the big box store.

A cowboy uses a noose for a clothesline.

Daisy had the fastest udders in the west field.