Cow Costume Collector Pillows

Horn Hair

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

Why Cows Leave Home

"You know that moon was passed a minute ago?..."

"They'd run out of nurses' uniforms..."

Mummy?!

"Calm down! That was a massive fart, NOT a sneeze!"

"I think I found the perfect time of year to sell my old clothes!"

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

'Is my make-up O.K.?'

Free Range Cows.

"It's lost all meaning in the steroid era."

"Trust me – she's a witch."

'Not another copycat accident?!?! That bloody nursery rhyme's got a lot to answer for.'

John Bull dressed in the French fashionable clothing of 1799

"All I could find was this butternut squash."

'Stampede!!'

Too Much?

"Ahem."

Pirate trying to choose what to wear

Pirate trying on parrots.

'Our accident in Wyoming wiped out our vacations for the next 5 years.'

'Is there a doctor in the house other than Doctor Love?'

"We can only apologise, Mr. Kent. But wouldn't you think that a superhero's uniform would be shrink-proofed?"

'When he said he was interested in balls I thought he meant football.'

'Serves me right for frowning.'

'As marriage is a fifty-fifty proposition, my advice is that you trade ends occasionally.'

"You rang?"

It's not so much modern art, it's more...revenge!

"I'm adopted? Well that explains so much."