Cow Costume Collector Pillows

Horn Hair

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

Why Cows Leave Home

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

'I don't know...they all look like cows to me.'

Milking the Cow.

"You know that moon was passed a minute ago?..."

Aw, geez, is my fly down again? Why Superman started wearing his underwear over his pants.

"They'd run out of nurses' uniforms..."

"Calm down! That was a massive fart, NOT a sneeze!"

Mummy?!

'Is my make-up O.K.?'

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

"I think I found the perfect time of year to sell my old clothes!"

'Not another copycat accident?!?! That bloody nursery rhyme's got a lot to answer for.'

John Bull dressed in the French fashionable clothing of 1799

"It's lost all meaning in the steroid era."

"Trust me – she's a witch."

Free Range Cows.

"All I could find was this butternut squash."

'Stampede!!'

"Ahem."

Too Much?

Pirate trying to choose what to wear

'Our accident in Wyoming wiped out our vacations for the next 5 years.'

Pirate trying on parrots.

"That's just UDDER NUN-sense."

'Is there a doctor in the house other than Doctor Love?'

'Serves me right for frowning.'

"Holy cow! This is bourbon!" "My husband is from Kentucky."

'When he said he was interested in balls I thought he meant football.'

"You rang?"

'As marriage is a fifty-fifty proposition, my advice is that you trade ends occasionally.'

"I'm adopted? Well that explains so much."