Courtroom Romantic T-Shirts

"Some call it jury tampering. I call it destiny."

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

Questions about an old case refuse to go away. . .

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"We won!"

"Now that's a win."

Sue the Author 3PM

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

"Bailiff."

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

"Now that I've swung back to depression, I'm truly sorry for what I did when I was manic."

'What'll it be?'

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

"Not guilty by reason of genetic determinism, Your Honor."

"Lights! Camera! Justice!"

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

'Do you expect the jury to believe that? And, more importantly, do you expect the viewers of the eventual TV movie of this trial to believe it?'

'We have irreconcilable differences -- he's a MAN!'

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'

Sue The Bastards

"Better that a hundred guilty men go free than one innocent man be convicted, right?"

'You are both charged with quarrelling without a license!'

"They're class action figures."

"Am I going to get my just desserts?"

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

'Let's try it again. And this time, don't cross your fingers.'

'I object, Your Honor! Hearsay evidence!'

Contest of wills.

"My client greatly regrets the incident with the carving knife. However, in her defense, 14 people were coming for Thanksgiving and her husband, who had just one job to do, bought only 8 rolls."

"Isn't it true that the prosecution offered you a bone to testify?"