Courtroom Fanatic T-Shirts

"Good trial." "Good trial." "Good trial."

"They sentenced me to three days community service instead of four years in juvie. It was extenuating circumstances - my dad is having an affair with the public prosecutor!"

'I'll cut my fee...if you plead guilty and throw yourself on the mercy of the court.'

'We won the battle with the Sue tribe, but we'll be in the courts for years.'

Trial by Media

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"We won!"

I love Lawyers

Barristers

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"Now that's a win."

Sue the Author 3PM

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

"When it comes to medical malpractice, most lawyers only go for the money... ...I go for the doctor's head."

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"Bailiff."

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"Now that I've swung back to depression, I'm truly sorry for what I did when I was manic."

John W. Law., John W. Law Jr., Robert Law, Janet Law, Attorneys at Law

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

Prosecution bears the burden of proof. Defense bears the burden of twisting and distorting said proof.

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

Yawning barristers in court

"Lights! Camera! Justice!"

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

'Do you expect the jury to believe that? And, more importantly, do you expect the viewers of the eventual TV movie of this trial to believe it?'

'We have irreconcilable differences -- he's a MAN!'