Courtroom Crackup T-Shirts

Come Back Sloane

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

Questions about an old case refuse to go away. . .

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

I love Lawyers

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"Now that's a win."

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

"Bailiff."

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

"You can't plead cute."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

"#notguilty."

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

"We make crime pay."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

Yawning barristers in court

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

Justice 4 Ron

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

'Your honor, if I may digress for a moment, who does your hair?'

Sue The Bastards