Courtroom Crackerjack Gifts

'Hello, Higgins Law Services... No, I'm sorry, Mr. Higgins is meeting with an important client at the moment...'

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

Questions about an old case refuse to go away. . .

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

I love Lawyers

'Court's in recess!'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"Now that's a win."

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

"You can't plead cute."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

"#notguilty."

"We make crime pay."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

Yawning barristers in court

A baby in court

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

'Your honor, if I may digress for a moment, who does your hair?'

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

Justice 4 Ron

'The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth in what sense?'

Sue The Bastards