Courtroom Canine Pillows

"It's non-negotiable."

"The circus was good but as 'Jo Jo, the dogged faced attorney', I'm making a killing."

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

"Bailiff."

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

"Permission To Treat Prosecutor as Hostile, Your Honor?"

"Another slander suit!"

"I'll tell you, mock jury duty beats cancer testing."

"Better that a hundred guilty men go free than one innocent man be convicted, right?"

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

"Recess is over, Your Honor."

'Let's try it again. And this time, don't cross your fingers.'

'I object, Your Honor! Hearsay evidence!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

Arrogant junior barrister

"'If you can't say something nice, don't say it at all' doesn't work with a grand jury."

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, dummy!'

So you'd like to be a lawyer...we require honest, genuine people, who are prepared to...learn how to fake sincerity.

'Hmmm...It is: innocent until proven guilty? Or is it: guilty until proven innocent?'

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

"Objections overruled...I also think the defendent looks extremly dodgy"

'I've never sued anyone but I bet I'll be good at it.'

'and for pushing your umbrella button in a VERY crowded elevator.'

"You can lie to the prosecutor but don't ever lie to your co-conspirators."

'Either it's a mistake, or this town's gone soft on crime.'

'I seem to have brought the wrong brief case, your honor.'

'I've been charged with evading jury duty.'

'You have an over reactive gagging reflex.'

Judges alarm clock: 'beep beep, all rise!'

Pinocchio and Partners Lawyers.

Judge