Court Strategist T-Shirts

'I'm feeling a little remiss about missing both free throws.'

'How about a game of cards?'

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

Prosecution bears the burden of proof. Defense bears the burden of twisting and distorting said proof.

"If we learned anything in law school, we learned that you can never have enough wiggle room."

"May I treat him as a hostile lawyer?"

'Our only option is to improve quality or hire more lawyers.'

"Excellent! It's the disclosure documents for your hearing on Monday."

"My loophole out-loopholes your loophole."

'I believe my trainee is putting together the trial bundle for you now.'

'Brain surgery, right?'

'...youngsters need to be shown how the law REALLY works if they want a career in it!'

'I'd like to sue my way to success.'

"Of course, if you get your client off in the initial trial you're throwing away the appeal fee."

Barrister pointing out dozing judge to the jury

Corporate Lawyers

Law school: 'Repeat after me, class 'sue 'em first, or be sued!'

Sports Lawyers

"Never lie to your attorney, Brad. If any lies need to be told I'll tell them."

'... And then Goldsmith here, said to him: 'Never mind, if you're innocent you have nothing to worry about'.'

'Not to worry, I've handled hundreds of cases like this and the way I see it, I'm bound to win one sooner or later.'

'We have obligations to our stockholders, our employees and our community - Fortunately, Henderson in legal has found a loophole.'

'I think our filing system is a little too obvious.'

Truth, justice and a damn good lawyer.

"And if, in court, you need to varnish the truth, don't make it high gloss."

"I don't like the looks of this! That's our jury consultant!"

'My client will give up the castle, as long as it is not an admission of defeat.'

Who to Sue Today.

'On the other hand, if we accept confessions extracted under torture then soon they won't need lawyers.'

'I think our best bet is the 'evil twin' defense.'

"You've been chewed up and spitout by some very prestigious firms."

"Relax - not only does the devil have the best tunes, he's also got a great lawyer."

Lawyers offices, with todays score card. - Won...Lost ...Tied

It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...