Court Jesters Of Philosophy T-Shirts

"Damn straight we're the only forms of intelligent life in the universe!"

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"Take this declaration of war and punch it up."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

'How about a game of cards?'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

COWS: Cow Pong

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"Mr. McMurdo has been called 'guilty as the day is long.' And yet, do not biblical scholars tell us a day can mean many things?"

"I say we move on to dessert."

Medieval headlines.

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

Justice 4 Ron

Basketball.

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

"Twenty five years! But your honor,

'It's all just an unfortunate misunderstanding, Your Honor, it was 'Talk Like a Pirate' day, and,,,,'

''Congress shall make no law'... now, I wonder what they meant by that...?'

'Yeah? -- Well, there's a thin line between being a strict constructionist and being a stupid jerk!'

"I'm working as fast as I can, Mr. Sims. There are only so many billable hours in a day, you know."

'What are the chances? I mean, all 10 players simultaneously dive for a loose ball and conk heads?'

Two lawyers in a royal court