Court Case Enthusiast Pillows

'I don't care what the judge says, I'm not disregarding that last statement'

"I think I can get you off with a lighter sentence, but it might screw up your movie deal."

"Wait, what if we convinced the jury that, while they're wasting their time with me, the real Socrates is still at large?"

Sue The Bastards

City Court: 'Justice delayed is par for the course.'

"The Badminton Horse Trials."

'The defendant had the motive, he had the opportunity, and let's face it, he's a killer bee.'

Trial by Media

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

I love Lawyers

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"You can't plead cute."

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

Violent Crime Statistics

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

The Birth of a Lawsuit

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

Lady Justice.

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

'Every day, I'm suing better and better...'

'I'm suing my way alphabetically through the phone book.'