Couple Routines Pillows

'Am I getting up or going to bed?'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Stephen and I are today's special."

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

"I think I need an extra pillow."

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

Sauvignon Bonk

'I love our hideaway. I only wish we could find it.'

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

"Hello coastguard, it's my husband, he's beached"

Try to guess the continent dining...

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

Giving birth with your husband present may be more painful.

Difference of Opinion

Mixed Doubles.

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

"No, our home wasn't stolen. Since it's a 'smart home', it keeps having itself moved to a nice neighborhood."

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"