Country Music Critic T-Shirts

While dreaming, Beethoven sees the future and loses hope,

'No way, I can't stand country and western.' (Farm Aid Rock festival in Somerset.)

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

"I like his earlier work better, particularly the ones I said I didn't like at the time."

Bashful in Nashville

"New studies show that the so-called 'lucky man' made popular by the prog-rock band Emerson, Lake and Palmer was, in fact, just very well-connected."

'I took your advice and got a long little doggy.'

'I can't write cheating songs because my wife's too insecure.'

"Of course I'm going to give him a tip - he should take lessons!"

"I'm astounded that your dog is channeling Eubie Blake! Has he never heard of Elton John?"

"I'm putting you on country music."

"I'll be broadminded up in heaven, but here on earth you're still a whore..."

Towny Music Night.

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

The Music Critic.

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

'I'll never forget the night I saw you across the crowded room of a dusty ol' honky tonk.'

'You had me at OOOO-AARRR!'

'Woke up this morning found someone had stolen my guitar...'

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

"This is Kevin. Kevin was uncool before uncool was cool."

"It's bad, Doc. the voices in my head are singing country western."

A singer being criticised

"Well of course you're depressed... You're a country and western singer."

A Modern Day Cowboy and his Horse.

"The harmonica! Boy you're lucky, my cowboy plays the double-bass! I tell you what, it's a pretty awkward thing to carry around..."

'I hate these purists who play Bach without any pedal'

Supply was out of harps.