Counseling Guru T-Shirts

'Your problem seems to be depression or angst...Depression I charge £75 a session angst is £125.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

Businesswoman Empowerment

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

Three gates of hell: marriage counseling, investments, company meetings

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

Sir Winston Churchill

'I'm not sure which one is the role model.'

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

'The downside to my meteoric rise to the top is that I didn't have the opportunity to step on many people.'

"I suppose just climbing the greasy pole is no longer an option..."

'The problem is, she's so damn crabby.'

'You know too much!'

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

"We've discovered they mate for life, as long as they don't discuss politics."

The Dubloon Stops Here

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

"Let's say you've always wanted to make someone a mixtape to show them how much you care about them. What's the best order? Do you start with songs about how rich you are before moving on to the songs about love? Or vice versa?. . .What order would best simulate sincerity?"

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"