Couch Surfing Guru T-Shirts

Hank had been asleep for hours, but amazingly his clicker finger kept going.

Low-Energy Drinks

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"Forget the harps, we can spend Eternity in there."

Binge Watch

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

'John is watching the game under protest.'

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

'Are you just back from work or on your way to the office?'

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

'Ah, business as usual.'

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

Watchdog

"These days, I'm mostly just legislating from the couch."

'Next on News 7...GM offers to bail out the government in the event of a shutdown...'

Eventual Motion Machine

Edna's Couch and Breakfast.

'Try putting a remote in one hand aan a beer in the other and see if he starts up.'

"Thanks so much for letting me crash here, I really appreciate how unassertive you are."

"Well, if I was ambitious, we'd have a nice house and more money, but I'd never be around."

"This is for all the things you have already heard about via social media."

Hank had been asleep for hours, but amazingly his clicker finger kept going.

There is no limit to the amount of nonsense that men can talk about football.