Couch Potato Enthusiast Pillows

'Where does the teacher get this? Wilbur shows no motivation in class!'

Newpaper reads: Cable Out - 1000s forced to read.

"Arlen keeps bragging about running 26 miles. What he fails to tell people is that it took him eight months to do it."

"In search of America's laziest man..."

"Herb, your brain is being recalled. Says here it can get stuck in neutral."

"He started off with a lazy eye and it spread to his whole body."

'Can you do something for my teenage son? He's afraid of hard work.'

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

"I'm tying to avoid the missteps of early success."

"He's fine, Ma'm."

'He wouldn't let go of his chair.'

'I cut the grass once, but it grew again.'

Sofa Change Machine.

"The public's taste in entertainment has certainly changed."

"Are you still in your original packaging? I've been thinking about returning you."

"Might be a good idea. . . but does it involve me getting out of the chair?"

"I don't think that lifting the remote control counts as exercise!"

'It can't be worth much.'

"I'm thinking of donating him to charity."

'I wish you wouldn't bite your nails.'

'See-he likes his chin so much he's added two more!'

'Making a To-Do List is on my Bucket List.'

Peace inactivist

'Well, whoever named us wildlife sure didn't live with you, Bernie!'

'You're ahead of your time-it says here we're gonna be a nation of fatties by 2020!'

American Idle

'You may not believe it now, but when your father was young, he was a mobile device.'

'I feel so... lethargic. Well, I would be if I could be bothered.'

Bill often considered cutting his armpit hair, but then he'd need to buy carpeting.

"I don't think that's what your fitness instructor meant by daily crunches."

"Ambitions... to be a couch potato"

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Why don't you come out and join us Tuesday night. We're a group committed to peacefully and nonviolently watching television."

"I just had him bolted to the floor."

"Here - now you're a couch potato au gratin."