Couch Potato Confessions Gifts

"Find the remote yet?"

'Not knowing my credit score can keep me from getting laid'

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

American Idle.

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

'I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still (would you believe?)')

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

Unconditional Loveseat

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

Homo Zapiens

'Where does the teacher get this? Wilbur shows no motivation in class!'

"I knew we agreed that you could be a stay-at-home dad, but that's when we decide to have children."

Couch Potatoes

Man watching football on T.V. in armchair made of beer cans.

"In da house"

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

'Whatever, crosswords are stupid.'

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

"This lockdown is GREAT! - We can spend all day on our computers, eating takeaway junk food and watching crap TV while gambling on our iphones!"

"I've decided to uninstall your personality and upload mine."

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

Working from Home.

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

"Mom wants us to spend 'Quality time' together, so don't blame me."

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

"Sometimes I wonder if it was worth all the trouble you went through to get yourself cloned."

"Hang on, I'll get him for you."

It's hammerhead time

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

Campaign 2016

"Alexa, tell me ways I can be less of a lazy slob who won't get up to turn off the lights."

"Why run a marathon when you can sleep through it?"