Couch Potato Chronicles Gifts

'You've been eating crisps in bed again, haven't you?'

"I knew we agreed that you could be a stay-at-home dad, but that's when we decide to have children."

"Just so it won't confuse you - the meal I've just called you for is in real time; the programme you're watching is a repeat."

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

Homo Zapiens

Unconditional Loveseat

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

'Where does the teacher get this? Wilbur shows no motivation in class!'

"Have I ever told you how sexy you look when you sit through overtime?"

Man watching football on T.V. in armchair made of beer cans.

Couch Potatoes

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

"I have a job! I'm an 'I reporter!'"

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

"In da house"

'Whatever, crosswords are stupid.'

"I've decided to uninstall your personality and upload mine."

Working from Home.

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

"Mom wants us to spend 'Quality time' together, so don't blame me."

Campaign 2016

It's hammerhead time

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

"Hang on, I'll get him for you."

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

"Why run a marathon when you can sleep through it?"