Couch Potato Champion Gifts

Resistance Training: 'Are you going to resist training all day?'

Rodney kicked off his new fitness regime by buying a heavier remote control

Hungry Panda Thirsty Hippo Curious Sloth

"Gary had a knee replacement. He replaced it with a cup holder."

"Nothin' like Olympic athletes to remind us all that a year of sporadic Zoom workouts ain't quite the achievement we thought it was."

"Wow, all the way from the couch. Have the endorphins kicked in?"

'I don't care what he says, child labor laws were never intended to protect the rights of children in their mid-30s.'

Watching TV on the side.

A dog sits in an armchair with a bone-shaped remote.

'It's from the University of Life...you failed!'

A Great Country

'Just as I thought...you can't collect on the life insurance by boring me to death.'

'The sparkle has gone out of our marriage, don't you think?'

"And this is my husband...he's into energy conservation, mostly his own!"

"You know how some people feel naked without jewelry? Stewart is like that without a remote."

'Retire? What if I want to go to college if I, you know, finish high school?'

'Unfortunately, ma'am, it's not worth a thing! The recliner, however, is quite valuable!'

Putting Down Roots.

"OK, maybe you have put on a few pounds during lockdown."

"I want to be so successful that it ruins my life."

"Don't you think it's time you started thinking about your legacy?"

'Now that's Real TV!'

'Marge! Do I have a will?'

'It's early days, but it looks as if downhill sofa jumping is fast becoming an Olympic discipline!'

"I guess we're kind of the Marsalis Family in reverse

'Because it's my New Year's resolution. That's why I sit here all the time.'

'He is in training for the London Olympics.'

'Someone told him life begins at forty. Now he's reserving his energies!'

"Why don't you take up a sport,son-like long distance running-away from home...?"

Sam with his atrophy trophy.

'You are being formatted to fit your screen.'

"He's an excellent multi-slacker."

"Oh, my bad! You're not dead, you just stopped living your life."

'The groundhog won't come out of his hole. He's too hungover from super bowl Sunday.'

"He's great at both sit and stay."