Couch Potato Athlete Gifts

"I'm inspired to try to run a marathon."

Runner thinking about sleeping.

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'He usually doesn't follow medical advice, but when the doctor told him to learn to relax...'

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

Homo Zapiens

Unconditional Loveseat

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

'Where does the teacher get this? Wilbur shows no motivation in class!'

'Now that's Real TV!'

"These few weeks off school have convinced me that I'm definitely a stay-at-home kid."

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

"It's tough to get him moving, but once he's going he never stops."

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

'My arms are getting shorter.'

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

... And by the end of the first quarter of the game, the famous 'Man Cave' was completely deserted.

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

"That's Reubens, he's an alternate lifestyle coach."

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

"I'm watching the hockey game. The score is 4 nothing for the Zamboni driver."

"10,000 steps...just answering doorbells."

'On the contrary, soap operas are a great time-saver -- you don't have to get married and have your OWN problems.'

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

"I'm sorry, you must have me confused with someone that does yard work."