Couch Potato Athlete Gifts

"I'm inspired to try to run a marathon."

Runner thinking about sleeping.

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'He usually doesn't follow medical advice, but when the doctor told him to learn to relax...'

Unconditional Loveseat

Homo Zapiens

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

'Where does the teacher get this? Wilbur shows no motivation in class!'

"These few weeks off school have convinced me that I'm definitely a stay-at-home kid."

'Now that's Real TV!'

"It's tough to get him moving, but once he's going he never stops."

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

Starvation Watching

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

"Another CSI spinoff? What's this one called?"

... And by the end of the first quarter of the game, the famous 'Man Cave' was completely deserted.

"That's Reubens, he's an alternate lifestyle coach."

'My arms are getting shorter.'

"This lockdown is GREAT! - We can spend all day on our computers, eating takeaway junk food and watching crap TV while gambling on our iphones!"

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

Lockdown Brain

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

"I'm sorry, you must have me confused with someone that does yard work."

'On the contrary, soap operas are a great time-saver -- you don't have to get married and have your OWN problems.'

"10,000 steps...just answering doorbells."